英文原文
Midlife is shifting and changing just like the rest of the world around us. All the old systems are crumbling that were built and born of domination. Built and born by the ego's domination, which is that chauvinistic standard that has elevated masculine energy and denigrated the feminine for thousands of years. That's starting to shift and find balance, where it's not then going to be a world of let's elevate the feminine and demigrate the masculine. That doesn't solve. It's the same problem, but rather instead of it being either or, how about together? I wonder what a world would look like when we value both our masculine and feminine consciousness energy. What does that mean? To celebrate and to honor and to value equally your creativity, feminine, as well as productivity, which is masculine. Your willpower, masculine, and your imagination, feminine. To value both your thinking, masculine, and your feelings, feminine. When they come together in harmony, they create a synergy that works. But we've lived in a world that has been taught and conditioned to separate, to judge one is better than the other one is less than, to divide things up. There's good emotions and bad emotions. Avoid the bad emotions and only go for the good emotions. No, there's just emotion. And some of those emotions expand. Love, joy, peace, happiness, and some of those emotions constrict and tighten. Guilt, shame, fear. They're not bad or good. They're expansive or constricting. When they're constricting, they're trying to tighten and grab your attention. They feel uncomfortable because they want to get your attention, say something's got to change here. You better slow down. You're going too fast. And yet we judge it as a good and bad and right and wrong and positive and negative. And that's what I'm talking about. The shift in the world from this singular authority into a community of connection, of working together with your soul, your higher self, working together with other people in your community, breaking out of that fierce, stubborn independence that so many people adhere to. And it's going to be important as we talk today specifically on how to thrive during midlife and beyond, is to realize, yes, it's important to be independent, but it can also be a trap. And let's dive into this idea, this terminology called midlife, actually began in 1818. It's an English term and it wasn't very popular until the 1960s. In the 1960s, midlife started to take on more meaning in our pop culture in the United States and around the world. Midlife, what it really is, is it's a bridge. It is a bridge of transition from your adult years into your elder years. Just like adolescence is the bridge between your childhood and your adulthood. Adolescence is a transition. Your body's changing. It's morphing. Hormones are kicking in. You're starting to grow taller. You're starting to grow hair. And that's something that throws a lot of people into chaos. In so many ways, midlife is a similar transition where you are shifting and changing on a fundamental level, but more so internally than externally. I guess there are physical things that your body's going to change. Your hormones, for instance, estrogen or testosterone, is going to wane some and that won't be such a driving energy or force in your life. It's going to maybe find balance or it'll deplete somewhat that you might need some form of support. But my point being is it's a transitional state, an in-between, and it's a time that is ripe for empowered change. When you begin to observe yourself, because you have history now. When you're adolescence, you didn't have much history. You had your childhood and everything was outside of you. It was your family and your friends and your neighbors. That's what you focused on more, is at that time, competing and comparing yourself to those around you. We can't continue to do that and live a productive life, especially during midlife. That's an opportunity for self-observation. You now have a track record, a track history of things you've experienced. You can look at your life with depth and meaning and start to understand who you truly are. Self-observation shifts and you go deeper to discover your authenticity during the midlife. That's one of the purposes for it. It's not the end. It would be like saying I'm giving up on myself at halftime at a football game. You're only half there and regardless of your age, midlife is expanding because of technology, because of health care. What used to be midlife was 30 to 35 and then it moved as we evolved as a collective group of human beings. We discovered washing your hands before performing surgery might be beneficial and it continued to expand the midlife. Where most people think 40-45 was midlife, now it's closer to 60. With what they're able to do with technology, if you're able to maintain good health in your body, you may be able to extend your life for another 20-30 years than you ever thought possible. The average age of those who die in the younger generation, born in the last 15 years, is going to be 100. It's going to be the average age according to studies. It makes sense because we've slowly been climbing in that direction, but it's going to be more exponential. Even if you're in midlife, you may not be as far into it or beyond it. Oh, I'm on the other side of it. Maybe not. Give yourself that break. And a big part of what our talk about today is to shake loose of the labels, the roles, who you had to be and become in the past to be safe, to be secure, and to finally dive deep into your authenticity. To be able to know thyself that is genuine, a real self, not a performance, not a label, because midlife crisis is a crisis of identity. It is a crisis of identity, and the answer to this crisis of identity is to know thyself, to know yourself. That's the antidote. So I want to talk about this because unfortunately we live in a world that values younger people, that values people who are productive, who can maintain work and can be productive and be useful in society. And then anyone who moves beyond that, especially into retirement, is cast aside. And that's a shame in our culture, especially here in America, that still happens. But it doesn't have to happen for you. You don't have to buy into that consensus game board. You can step out of that game board and create a thriving existence in your midlife and beyond. Let's talk about a crisis of identity. How did you get to know yourself? As a little infant child, you started to identify yourself by what you have. I have a mommy, I have a daddy. I only have a mommy, I don't have a daddy. I have two sisters, I have a brother, I have a house, and I have my own bedroom, and I have my toys, and everything is who I am is what I have. That's obviously a very immature identity, but it's a part of your development. As an infant child, you identify yourself by what you have. And then you start school, and you start getting into roles, and you start to identify with your education level. You identify with your education roles. Oh, I'm a high school cheerleader, right? I'm a kindergartner. I'm a third grader. I'm a fifth grader who's played in the band. But it's expanding into more of an academic role, from what you have to, to some degree, your educational level of identity. I'm still underage. I'm still a minor. I identify with that. And that's important. Again, this is the stages of development. Then as you grow, and as you mature, you become a grown-up. And then once you shift your identity, it's what I do for work. Okay, what I have is important, but that doesn't define me as much. My education roles, oh yeah, people cling to that. I have five PhDs in graduate schools, and that's who I am. See how smart I am. That's your education. That's a part of your journey, absolutely. But you're so much more than any of this. That's what this time of transition, called midlife, gives you an opportunity to explore your genuine, authentic self. So what do you do for work? You start to identify, well, I'm a lawyer. I'm a doctor. I'm a therapist. And that's where the identity and the crisis begins. Because when you put all of your self-esteem and value from what you have and what you do into this illusion, and then you wake up in the middle of life, and you realize, okay, I can't keep doing what I've always done. And actually, I have less things now. I've gotten rid of things. I've downsized. Or you could still have a lot of stuff. It wouldn't matter. But it won't mean anything to you. It'll be meaningless stuff. That's called the trappings of success. Oh, I thought when I was 20, 30, I had the big house and the big car and have five boats and have 12 cars and have those people who come to midlife have done everything, followed all those rules of what will make them happy. And they still feel something's missing. They still feel an emptiness because you're not what you have or what you do. Those are part of it. But the time of midlife is when people often have an awakening, where they start, their soul starts to say, okay, it's time now. They've got enough experience, enough living life. It's time now for them to remember who they are. And unfortunately, the soul tries to reach out even during the midlife to help you to become who you've always been destined to be. Beyond the labels, beyond the roles, beyond the things you have and what you do in life, who you are. So you shift from what I have to what I do to who I am, who I've always been beneath all those roles and behind those labels. I've been protecting this vulnerable part of me, my spiritual being, my spiritual being, absolutely. But the unique expression of the divine that you are and have always been. And that's when the midlife opens you up to an opportunity, an opportunity for greater success and personal fulfillment in your life. Where you're no longer auditioning for people's value and support or that job interview, no longer auditioning for their love and their approval and their acceptance, where you have begun to more fully accept yourself. Not that you're perfect, but that you are unique. That's a level that can shift the midlife crisis. The crisis comes when you don't know who you are and you feel very lost. You feel a sense of dread when you have over-identified for 30, 40, 50 years with what you have and what you do and your degrees on the wall and all that stuff is important. I'm not saying it's not valuable, but I'm saying it's not enough to create lasting fulfillment and success within yourself. To feel that you matter. If I get all those things, to get approval, to get the praise, to know that I matter, that people, that I'm useful, and in the midlife, I realize, okay, I'm not gonna be able to work at this job forever. Then not only am I losing my job, I'm losing my self-esteem. I'm losing my value and worth because I've attached it to what I have and what I do. If I can't do that, I'm not valuable. And that's sad. When people go into mediocrity and just give up on their futures, not realizing that there's lots of other options and choices, that you can turn what could be a midlife crisis into a midlife opportunity, an opportunity for exceptional change, where you deepen and find personal peace, knowing that you're valuable. Not having to audition anymore, but just holding the presence of your wisdom that you've earned through all the experiences in your past. Turning and looking at midlife is an opportunity to get real, to be more authentic, and to discover who you've always been, but now to align and to fully embrace the truth of who you are. That's the challenge. You're not going to do it in a weekend. It's a continual process because you are an eternal being. You're always growing and evolving. Please make a donation. It really supports my work in the world, helping me to reach other people, and supporting Insight Timer. Also, I have some great courses on Insight Timer and a lot of different tracks. Do a search on my name. You can find all my premium tracks as well as my standard tracks that are available on my website. Until next time, may your journey in life continue to reveal the beautiful truth of who you are, and who you are as a powerful and majestic spiritual being.
中文翻译
中年就像我们周围的世界一样，正在转变和变化。所有建立在支配基础上的旧体系正在崩溃。这种支配源于自我，是一种数千年来抬高男性能量、贬低女性能量的沙文主义标准。这种状况正在开始转变并寻求平衡，而不是变成一个抬高女性、贬低男性的世界。这并不能解决问题。这是同样的问题，但与其非此即彼，不如携手合作？我想知道，当我们同时重视男性和女性意识能量时，世界会是什么样子。这意味着什么？这意味着平等地庆祝、尊重和重视你的创造力（女性特质）和生产力（男性特质）。你的意志力（男性特质）和想象力（女性特质）。重视你的思维（男性特质）和感受（女性特质）。当它们和谐地结合在一起时，就会产生有效的协同作用。但我们生活在一个被教导和条件反射地分离、评判一个比另一个好或差、划分事物的世界。有好的情绪和坏的情绪。避免坏的情绪，只追求好的情绪。不，只有情绪。有些情绪是扩张性的，如爱、喜悦、和平、幸福；有些情绪是收缩和紧绷的，如内疚、羞耻、恐惧。它们不是好或坏，而是扩张性或收缩性的。当它们收缩时，它们试图收紧并抓住你的注意力。它们让你感到不舒服，因为它们想引起你的注意，告诉你有些事情需要改变。你最好放慢速度。你走得太快了。然而，我们却将其评判为好与坏、对与错、积极与消极。这就是我所说的。世界正在从单一权威转向连接的社区，与你的灵魂、更高的自我合作，与社区中的其他人合作，摆脱许多人坚持的那种激烈、顽固的独立性。今天我们要特别讨论如何在中年及以后茁壮成长，重要的是要意识到，是的，独立很重要，但它也可能是一个陷阱。让我们深入探讨这个概念，这个术语“中年”实际上始于1818年。这是一个英语术语，直到20世纪60年代才流行起来。在20世纪60年代，中年开始在美国和世界各地的流行文化中具有更多意义。中年，它实际上是一座桥梁。它是从成年到老年的过渡桥梁。就像青春期是童年和成年之间的桥梁一样。青春期是一个过渡期。你的身体在变化。它在变形。荷尔蒙开始起作用。你开始长高。你开始长头发。这让很多人陷入混乱。在许多方面，中年是一个类似的过渡期，你在根本上发生转变和变化，但更多的是内在而非外在。我想你的身体会有一些物理变化。例如，你的荷尔蒙，雌激素或睾酮，会有所减少，这不会成为你生活中的主要驱动力。它可能会找到平衡，或者会有所耗尽，你可能需要某种形式的支持。但我的观点是，这是一个过渡状态，一个中间状态，这是一个充满赋能改变的时机。当你开始观察自己时，因为你有了历史。当你处于青春期时，你没有太多历史。你有你的童年，一切都在你之外。那是你的家人、朋友和邻居。那时你更关注的是与周围的人竞争和比较。我们不能继续这样做并过上富有成效的生活，尤其是在中年时期。这是一个自我观察的机会。你现在有了一个记录，一个你经历过的历史。你可以深入而有意义地审视你的生活，开始理解你真正是谁。自我观察发生转变，你深入探索，在中年时期发现你的真实性。这是它的目的之一。这不是终点。这就像在足球比赛的中场休息时放弃自己。你只走了一半，无论你的年龄如何，中年正在扩展，因为科技，因为医疗保健。过去中年是30到35岁，然后随着我们作为人类集体的进化而移动。我们发现手术前洗手可能有益，这继续扩展了中年。大多数人认为40-45岁是中年，现在更接近60岁。随着科技的发展，如果你能保持身体健康，你可能能够将寿命延长20-30年，比你想象的更长。年轻一代的平均死亡年龄，即过去15年出生的人，将达到100岁。根据研究，这将是平均年龄。这是有道理的，因为我们一直在缓慢地向这个方向攀升，但将更加指数级增长。即使你处于中年，你可能还没有那么深入或超越它。哦，我在另一边。也许不是。给自己一个喘息的机会。我们今天讨论的一个重要部分是摆脱标签、角色，你过去为了安全、保障而必须成为和变成的人，最终深入探索你的真实性。能够认识真实的自己，一个真实的自我，不是表演，不是标签，因为中年危机是身份危机。它是身份危机，而解决这个身份危机的答案是认识自己，认识你自己。这就是解药。所以我想谈谈这个，因为不幸的是，我们生活在一个重视年轻人、重视那些有生产力、能维持工作、对社会有用的人的世界。然后任何超越这一点的人，尤其是退休的人，就被抛弃了。这是我们文化中的耻辱，尤其是在美国，这种情况仍然发生。但这不必发生在你身上。你不必接受这种共识游戏板。你可以走出那个游戏板，在中年及以后创造繁荣的存在。让我们谈谈身份危机。你是如何认识自己的？作为一个婴儿，你开始通过你拥有的东西来识别自己。我有一个妈妈，我有一个爸爸。我只有一个妈妈，我没有爸爸。我有两个姐妹，我有一个兄弟，我有一所房子，我有自己的卧室，我有我的玩具，一切关于我是谁就是我拥有什么。这显然是一个非常不成熟的身份，但它是你发展的一部分。作为一个婴儿，你通过你拥有的东西来识别自己。然后你开始上学，你开始进入角色，你开始认同你的教育水平。你认同你的教育角色。哦，我是高中啦啦队长，对吧？我是幼儿园学生。我是三年级学生。我是五年级学生，在乐队演奏。但它扩展到更多的学术角色，从你拥有的东西到某种程度上的教育身份。我仍然未成年。我仍然是未成年人。我认同这一点。这很重要。再次，这是发展阶段。然后随着你成长和成熟，你成为一个成年人。然后一旦你转变身份，那就是我做什么工作。好吧，我拥有的东西很重要，但这并不能定义我太多。我的教育角色，哦，是的，人们紧紧抓住这个。我在研究生院有五个博士学位，这就是我。看我多聪明。这是你的教育。这是你旅程的一部分，绝对。但你远不止这些。这就是这个被称为中年的过渡时期给你机会探索你真实、真实的自我。那么你做什么工作？你开始认同，嗯，我是律师。我是医生。我是治疗师。这就是身份和危机开始的地方。因为当你把你所有的自尊和价值从你拥有的和做的事情投入到这个幻觉中，然后你在中年醒来，你意识到，好吧，我不能继续做我一直做的事情。实际上，我现在拥有的东西更少了。我摆脱了一些东西。我缩小了规模。或者你仍然可以有很多东西。这无关紧要。但它对你来说毫无意义。它将是毫无意义的东西。这被称为成功的陷阱。哦，我以为当我20岁、30岁时，我拥有大房子、大汽车、五艘船、12辆车，那些进入中年的人已经做了一切，遵循了所有那些会让他们快乐的规则。他们仍然觉得缺少了什么。他们仍然感到空虚，因为你不是你拥有的或你做的事情。那些是其中的一部分。但中年时期是人们常常觉醒的时候，他们开始，他们的灵魂开始说，好吧，现在是时候了。他们有足够的经验，足够的生活。现在是时候让他们记住他们是谁了。不幸的是，灵魂甚至在中年时期试图伸出援手，帮助你成为你一直注定要成为的人。超越标签，超越角色，超越你拥有的东西和你在生活中做的事情，你是谁。所以你从“我拥有什么”到“我做什么”转变为“我是谁”，我一直是那些角色和标签背后的那个人。我一直在保护我这个脆弱的部分，我的灵性存在，我的灵性存在，绝对。但你是神圣的独特表达，你一直是。这就是中年为你打开机会的时候，一个在生活中获得更大成功和个人满足的机会。你不再为人们的价值和支持或那份工作面试而试镜，不再为他们的爱、认可和接受而试镜，你开始更充分地接受自己。不是你完美，而是你独特。这是一个可以转变中年危机的水平。危机发生在你不知道自己是谁，感到非常迷失的时候。当你过度认同30、40、50年的你拥有的东西、你做的事情、墙上的学位以及所有那些重要的东西时，你会感到一种恐惧。我不是说它没有价值，但我说它不足以在你内心创造持久的满足和成功。感觉到你很重要。如果我得到所有那些东西，得到认可，得到赞扬，知道我重要，人们，我有用，而在中年，我意识到，好吧，我不能永远做这份工作。那么我不仅失去工作，还失去自尊。我失去价值和价值，因为我把它附加到我拥有的和做的事情上。如果我不能做那些，我就没有价值。这是可悲的。当人们陷入平庸，放弃他们的未来，没有意识到有很多其他选择和机会，你可以把可能的中年危机转变为中年机会，一个卓越改变的机会，在那里你深化并找到个人和平，知道你有价值。不再需要试镜，只是持有你通过过去所有经历获得的智慧的存在。转身看待中年是一个变得真实、更真实的机会，发现你一直是谁，但现在对齐并完全拥抱你真实的真相。这就是挑战。你不会在一个周末完成它。这是一个持续的过程，因为你是一个永恒的存在。你总是在成长和进化。请捐款。这真的支持我在世界上的工作，帮助我接触到其他人，并支持Insight Timer。此外，我在Insight Timer上有一些很棒的课程和许多不同的轨道。搜索我的名字。你可以找到我所有的优质轨道以及我网站上可用的标准轨道。下次见，愿你的生命旅程继续揭示你是谁的美好真相，以及你作为一个强大而庄严的灵性存在是谁。
文章概要
本文探讨了中年作为生命过渡期的挑战与机遇，强调通过冥想和自我观察来提升创造力与目标感。文章指出，中年危机本质上是身份危机，源于过度认同外在标签和角色，如物质拥有、职业身份等。作者提倡平衡男性和女性意识能量，接纳所有情绪作为扩张或收缩的信号，而非好坏评判。中年被视为一个桥梁阶段，提供了深入探索真实自我、摆脱社会期望、实现个人成长和灵性觉醒的机会。通过冥想实践，个体可以转变视角，将中年危机转化为赋能改变的契机，从而在生命后半程找到更深层的满足和目的。
高德明老师的评价
这篇文章就像在说，人到中年就像玩游戏到了中间关卡，有时候会觉得有点迷茫，不知道接下来该怎么玩。但别担心，这其实是个好机会，可以停下来看看自己，想想自己真正喜欢什么、擅长什么，就像重新认识一下自己这个好朋友一样。通过冥想，就像给大脑做个放松操，可以帮助我们更清楚地看到自己的内心，找到新的创意和目标，让生活变得更精彩有趣。
从佛学的各个宗派视角来看，这篇文章的内容与大乘佛教的“自觉觉他”精神高度契合。中年过渡期中的自我观察和身份探索，类似于佛教中的“观照自心”，旨在破除我执和法执。显宗强调通过戒定慧三学来认识真实自我，而密宗如准提法，则通过持咒和观想来快速净化业障、开启智慧。从《显密圆通成佛心要集》的视角，中年危机可视为业力显现的契机，准提法的修持能帮助行者在此阶段整合显密教法，以“即身成佛”的愿力，将生命转变转化为菩提道上的资粮。准提法以其简便易行和效验迅速，特别适合现代人在繁忙生活中应用，促进内在平衡与灵性成长。
在修行实践上，这篇文章的内容可以应用于解决人们的十个问题：1. 身份迷失感，通过冥想培养正念，认清自我本质；2. 创造力枯竭，借助准提咒语激发灵感；3. 生活缺乏目标，以佛教发菩提心为导向，找到利他方向；4. 情绪波动，学习接纳所有情绪为修行助缘；5. 中年焦虑，通过禅定培养内心平静；6. 人际关系疏离，实践慈悲冥想增进连接；7. 自我价值感低，观想佛性本具提升自信；8. 身体变化困扰，以佛教无常观坦然面对；9. 灵性空虚，修持准提法充实内在；10. 未来迷茫，以佛教因果观规划善行。准提法的优点在于其圆融显密，适合各种根器，能快速净化心识，帮助行者在中年阶段实现生命转化，迈向更圆满的修行境界。